So, yeah, I'm re-reading a book (only the second time I'm reading it). I'm enjoying it, quite a bit, but I'm approaching the start of the main plot (even though I'm several chapters in, the book has been teasing the subplot as the main plot, even as far as the end of the first book).
Why is that a problem? A bit of non-specific backstory (though I'm sure some people can probably identify the series). Due to natural disaster, the world as we know it is gone. Much of the sky is blocked out in an ashy cloud, triggering a massive "volcanic" winter. Technology is gone, agriculture is all but gone, few farm animals are alive and society is in the shitter. Some people band together for cooperation and support, others to prey on the weak.
The first book has the protagonist separated from his family and covers his journey to reach them. He comes into contact with various other people (some friendly, some not, some murderous and cannibalistic). He meets a girl, they fall for each other, and she ends up joining him on his quest to rejoin his family. Eventually, after several inches-from-death moments, they make it. Problem? His family isn't all there, his parents took off shortly after the disaster to go find him.
Book two starts a few months later as our hero and his girlfriend/lover/lifepartner/soulmate, following a clue that they came across from a group of roaming bandits (evil dudes who rape, kill and pillage), take off to find his parents.
Here's the hard part. They get separated. While trying to fight off one of the gangs, the girlfriend is shot and falls off a highway overpass onto a vehicle operated by the gang and our hero is alone, heartbroken and devastated. He has no idea if she's alive or dead or if this gang was one of those cannibalistic gangs he's been hearing about. His biggest fear being, in searching for his parents, not knowing if they're alive or dead, that he would lead his love to her death.
Now, I've read it before, I know what happens, I know that they find each other and end up safe (well, as safe as a post-disaster world with cannibal gangs and most people having an "everyone for themselves" mentality can be), but still, it's hard to read that part.
I get the same feeling from the last few episodes of Chuck (the ones involving Nicholas Quinn, Sarah uploading the faulty Intersect and having the memories of the last 5 years essentially erased). I mean, we spent so much time watching Chuck and Sarah finally admit their feelings for each other and to actually take that step to be together, through almost-moments, near death experiences and even a period where they end up together at the end of one season only to start the next broken up and the furthest from each other emotionally as they could be, to repairing their friendship only to see other people. They finally get together, they even get married, but can they have 5 minutes of peace and quiet just to enjoy it? Nope.
After the Volkoff mission (and the Volkoff-daughter mission), Chuck and Sarah end up with the liquidated assets of Volkoff Industries (turns out Volkoff was an Intersect-implanted personality as part of a CIA/MI6 joint mission that went haywire and Volkoff was actually a close friend to Chuck's father, and was part of the team that actually developed the original Intersect) they're out of the CIA, Chuck had the intersect forcibly removed (turns out that and their firing were part of a plan by Daniel Shaw as one last attempt at vengeance which occupies the first half of season 5) and have decided to use their skills and experience (and near billion-dollar bank balance) to start their own private security/investigation firm (basically, private-sector spies for hire). Oh, and Morgan temporarily gets a bad Intersect upload (meant for Chuck) that starts wiping his memories as he uses it. It gets removed, but not without some permanent memory loss.
Meanwhile, Chuck and Sarah are slowly discovering how emotionally exhausting and family-incompatible life as spies (private or government) is, and are looking to get out of the business and move into something a little more family friendly (they come to the realization that they both REALLY want to start a family, kids and all, eventually). Of course, they end up with one last mission. What does that involve? Recovering a pair of Intersect glasses from the hands of a former-CIA agent who went rogue. Sounds easy, right? Hah.
They get the glasses, but Mr. Quinn (the rogue former agent) captures Chuck and ransoms him for the glasses. Sarah, despite knowing they're the same version as the ones that messed with Morgan's brain, uploads it into her head in order to get herself and Casey out of certain death. Quinn eventually captures Sarah, forces her to flash (and thus wiping her memory of everything about her time with Chuck), and ends up convincing her that he's a good guy and Chuck is a rogue agent with a kill order on him.
Eventually the truth comes out, Sarah realizes that she's been played, that her life with Chuck wasn't an act or a cover, that it was real, but that she doesn't feel it. It's someone elses life, essentially. So, she leaves Chuck (not knowing how to be the girl he knows) and goes after Quinn (who discovered a device that was a part of the original Intersect design that was meant to avoid all the brain-melty parts the recent Intersect versions have been plagued with). Chuck eventually pairs up with her after her first attempt fails, and he tries to jog her memory (with limited success, but with some actual success, just some very minor things, but things that show that her life with Chuck isn't necessarily completely gone). Eventually, Quinn assembles the "perfect" Intersect, Chuck and Sarah reach him before he can use it, they kill Quinn and recover it. Turns out that this Intersect could restore Sarah's lost memories, but because of the design, the device could only be used once before frying the circuitry and Chuck needs the Intersect to defuse a bomb planted in a concert hall currently being attended by several high-ranking military personnel.
So, Chuck uses it, saves the day but had to sacrifice getting the love of his life back in order to do it. The team is disbanded (Sarah goes to "find herself", Casey goes to hook up with his adversary/girlfriend and Chuck is left alone).
Chuck decides to track her down one last time for one last attempt at keeping her in his life (in whatever form he can), and finds her at the very same beach Sarah found Chuck at in the very first episode after their first mission (there are a lot of parallels in this episode to the first, kind of a full-circle concept). She's not sure WHY that beach means something, but she knows it does. So, Chuck talks with her, explains that he knows that the memories are effectively gone and that he's not expecting to be able to pick their relationship back up where they left it, but that the most important thing for him was that she trust him and not completely cut him out, that however she needs him, he'll be there. Sarah asks Chuck to tell her their story, and by the end, though she doesn't remember, it seems like she's willing to give it a shot and see if they can rebuild what they lost.
That's another thing that, while it ends on a positive note, the low point is such a kick in the nuts it's hard to watch. I mean, CAN'T THESE PEOPLE JUST BE HAPPY FOR ONCE?
You've got Chuck and Sarah, Alex and Darla, Buffy and Spike, Angel and Cordelia, Mal and Inara, Eragon and Arya. I mean shit, if it's not one thing, it's another.
I'm not exactly sure why I feel this way, or maybe I do. Maybe it has something to do with my own complete lack of relationship success. Maybe it's me living vicariously through these fictional characters. Maybe it's the thinking that if these pairings, whom are obvious soulmates (if you believe in that type of thing) can't end up together, with something always coming inbetween them, what hope does a normal guy like me have?
Yeah, I don't know. Twenty-nine year old virgin here, so what do I know. Maybe I look for relationships like what these characters have because I'm getting to the point where I think I'll never have something like they do (or even a fraction of what they have). If I haven't experienced even a part of it by now, maybe it's too late, and that the best I can hope for are these fictional characters?
I should see a shrink (and a dietitian and a personal trainer), but damn, they can be expensive.
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